PERMISSIONS: To view the blog, post on it, and comment on posts, you must be invited. I will send you an email invitation to join the blog, and then you must follow the instructions to join up and begin posting. You can't join the blog without first creating a Google account.

POSTING: Post your poems by clicking "New Post" at the top right of the page. Paste your poem into the window.

LABELING: Then label the post with the assignment name (i.e., "confessional poem," "sonnet," etc.), your name (i.e., "Tony Barnstone," etc.), and the week (i.e., "week one," "week two," but not "week 1"--spell out your numbers). If you post a poem in week two that is due in week three, label it "week three." When you begin to type in a label, the program will fill it in for you, so your post will be labeled with the rest of the poems in the same category.

COMMENTING: Afterwards, you can "comment" on the posts of your classmates. Post "group one" and "group two" one-page critical responses as "comments" on the posted poems, but also print out copies for me and for the poet and give them to us in class.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Roots

My fingers traveled over the roots engraved in her hand
Her salt and pepper hair waved over her head like a field of curls
The youth in her eyes fell low and sunk into her skull
The wrinkles around her mouth helped curve her smile

Her salt and pepper hair waved over her head like a field of curls
We mirrored each other through a portal of generations
The wrinkles around her mouth helped curve her smile
Same olive smooth skin

We mirrored each other through a portal of generations
Honey hinted eyes glowed around the almond shapes
Same olive smooth skin
High structured cheekbones brushed off with rose petals

Honey hinted eyes glowed around the almond shapes
Black thick eyebrows arched like mountains
High structured cheekbones brushed off with rose petals
Her long glowing pearls draped over my collarbone

Black thick eyebrows arched like mountains
She tightly wrapped her wings around my youth
Her long glowing pearls draped over my collarbone
My fingers traveled over the roots engraved in her hand
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1 comment:

  1. michael knoxMay 12, 2009 at 11:28 AM

    Beautiful imagery. This poem really expresses a lot of emotion in the images it makes. I really get this image of an old lady who still feels young, maybe longing to revisit the youth again. The parallel used in the poem, of sharing the same features is brilliant and my favorite line is the "almond shapes" that is expressing the similarities of the two. The way the pantoum is perfect for this poem, where you repeat lines in each stanza. It almost gives a stonger comparison because the same lines are used to describe both people in the poem.
    Maybe now though since form can be changed, you might be able to open up the poem a little bit more and get your ideas down better. It is an excellent poem and i am not taking anything away from it, but im sure there were things you wanted to say here that couldn't fit the form. Nows your chance.
    Keep up the imagery. I think this poem is one of your strongest and its so rich with images that it can be a very successful piece if elaborated on. Though i was confused about the wings around my youth, i like the image. It is like she is cradling her in her arms, maybe protecting her, but if you want to keep wings in there use it somewhere else in the poem so that we can relate it. Also wings is such an elegant image, and you describe the woman's hands as roots, kind of a contradiction. Great poem.

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